During my youth, until my major turn over in life, I began many tasks, yet I failed to complete almost all of them. My father was so disappointed about me as I used to start many things and abandon them somewhere down the line. There were many educational programmes and jobs I undertook but I gave up very soon due to my inability in moving forward amidst the pressures in life. My default mode was set to giving up. It was my first and favourite resort. Today, I witness the same nature amongst a vast community of those whose first resort is to give up whenever pressure surrounds them.

Every time we give up, our brains release molecules of discouragement, which surpasses many motivational chemicals such as Dopamine and Oxytocin. When you constantly keep on giving up, your mind gets accustomed to that responsive pattern. The moment you or someone else attempts to move forward, the brain identifies it as an obstacle, as their brain has been set to give up by default. Next, your brain sends a signal defining the situation as a pressure that is alien to you, hence, you easily become exhausted.

When I began my life for the second time it was indeed natural for my brain to transmit signals of discouragement, as all I knew was only to give up. It was exactly the same as trying to feed a spicy meal to a person from a western country, whose taste pallet is a complete paradox to spicy food. So, whenever you are exhausted before your challenges, the first thing you must do is to understand that your mind is allergic to your decisions as they have been used to consuming the same food for many years. If you want to succeed, there is no other option than challenging your own mind, until it identifies moving forward as its default mode.

This is indeed challenging but it requires continuous training. It needs an unwavering focus and a strong attachment to your vision. A person who is accustomed to eating non spicy food is certainly not going to eat spicy food all at once. Acclimatisation requires training and an unwavering focus. When I was a youngster, due to associating with many small minded people, I used to use a lot of filth when I talked. The moment I was thrown into the professional world, taming my tongue became a special task for me. In order to tame something, you must be vigilantly conscious about it.

The moment your mind becomes unconscious about your tongue, it will release filth without your consent, as that is what your system is accustomed to respond whenever you are frustrated. In order to overcome this, you must feed your mind knowledge and then continue to act based on that knowledge. You are sure to fall countless times, but as long as you bounce back one step ahead from the point you fell, it is a victory. There is nothing known as failure in the present tense as long as you bounce back whilst learning. If you have learnt something that you can make use of in the future, then you have not fallen but you have matured.

Failure is a stagnated state but maturity is a growing process. Today, I do not speak in filth, and the moment anyone speaks in filth I feel very irritated about it. Notice the difference you could attain once you have made a firm decision to revert a status that you have understood to be non progressive. Twenty years ago, the first and last thing I used to do during the day was to consume drugs. The first and last thing I do today is pray fervently. Therefore, do not believe any lies that come from within you that justifies who you are. People who believe in their own lies say “well , this is me”.

That is certainly not you, it is a lie which you have believed that your mind said based on what your brain releases due to the person you were in your past. You need to change these destructive mind patterns. If you hail from a weaker generational DNA, do not let it define who you are. Decide and commit to make a successful generation. My grandfather was a domestic and I am a famous Life Coach and a CEO. Every time that a person tries to pull me back with their wicked schemes, I say out loud that I am more than a conqueror, I will fly as high as an eagle, I will always become the head and not the tail, I am blessed, I am like a tree that grows on the river bank, I have no room in the stores of my mind to store discouraging words that others say.

Hence, I did not give up because what I believed was far greater than what others believed about me. It is so sad to see how people just believe what others say about them rather than believing in themselves. It was an easy task for Dasun Shanaka and the Sri Lankan cricket team to believe what the world said about them when they lost their first match against Afghanistan. Yet, they continued to believe in themselves. When Albert Einstein was small he was told that he would not amount to much, yet he went on to become one of the best scientists in the world who discovered the theory of relativity. Focus on the final product and not on the production process. With regard to Dasun Shanaka and his team of mighty warriors the end result is the Asia Cup.

Their minds were well focused not on the bad wrapping and mischaracterizing statements of the small minded media channels, who have no issue in selling their souls for prostitution just because of the five minutes of popularity that their channel receives. You cannot win the cup if you give up just because the practice sessions are difficult. Do not watch extremely unrealistic Fairy Tales. I have restricted my family from watching sugary Hindi movies as they can be so poisonous and it has the ability to hallucinate your pattern of thinking and isolate you in a dream world. You need to understand that there will be road bumps, muddy puddles, unexpected traps, extremely hurtful feelings, rejection, relationship breakups, misunderstandings and many more that are a part of this life package.

Discipline your mind to hang on. There is a famous test known as the Marshmallow Test where a plate or Marshmallow is kept before a group of little children and they are observed to see who can hang on the longest without consuming them. Before the test the children are told that those who hang on without eating them during a stipulated time will be given double the amount of marshmallows. It is quite evident that even after being told so, many children consume the marshmallows out of their impatience. Discipline your mind and set boundaries on what, when and how much to take in.

While I was studying in the USA, we were given a time of only two minutes to have a shower. We were trained thoroughly. You may wonder if it is even possible to have a shower in two minutes. Well, it is certainly possible as we all did it for a long period of time. Many waste their time in the shower, thinking of everything they desire or they contemplate on their problems. If you focus completely on having a shower then a few minutes is sure to be sufficient. You do not sleep when you are eating nor do you eat when you are sleeping. Therefore, disciplining your mind is a must.

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